By Sarah Jones
Poor Sean Hannity. This fellow is such a perfect product of corporately entitled pseudo rage that he gets all wound up and falls flat on his face right in the middle of a good projection. While attempting to insult the President, the little lost boy tripped over his own limited knowledge of basic English as he was whining that Obama is a “crybaby.” Sean explained that since “crybaby” is an “adjective,” it’s not a name and hence, Sean is not name-calling. Only crybaby is not an adjective. Crybaby is a noun. And Sean is whining. Sean is the cry-baby. We wonder why Sean’s buddies all want to defund public education when so clearly they could benefit from a little one-on-one with an English and Civics teacher.
The real problem here is that the President is more of a grown up than Sean can even imagine. Obama is cleaning up the Bush mess, and Sean just can’t stand it. It hurts poor Sean to have his world view destroyed as Obama proves to be more fiscally responsible than any Republican President has been for ages. Little Sean can’t stand the challenge to his beliefs. So, he denies there was a mess at all, and instead, pins all of Bush’s mistakes onto Obama in order to protect his own limited world view and feelings.
Then, feeling attacked by minorities, Sean climbs up onto his Fox cross every night and anoints himself CEO of White Whining (also known as representing the Tea Party). He cries about not being able to use the n-word when black people can. Oh, my gosh, the world is SO unfair! He whines about Obama and the billionaires coming for him, even though his entire life’s work has been devoted to furthering the greed of corporations at the expense of American citizens. He whines if Obama wants to tax the rich because rich people are successful and we should worship then, and then he whines if rich people agree with the President that our current tax code is unfair to the middle class and poor. He whines and whines and whines and whines… Poor little Sean Hannity. The world just doesn’t believe in all of the scary monsters coming for him. No one feels his pain when he and his friends are asked not to be hateful. It’s all so unfair.
Worst of all for poor Sean, he really, really, really wanted to pin “crybaby” onto Obama. He’s been trying for years to get Frank Luntz to run with this moniker. And this is just one more reason why Sean feels sorry for himself. Because in the end, Sean is no one. He’s certainly not the President, he’s not an elected official, he’s just a puppet for the Koch brothers and everyone knows that anyone can do that — even the quitter Sarah Palin can do that.
So, yeah. Sean is a crybaby, but it’s okay, because he’s entitled to whine like a wee baby. After all, the poor guy can’t even insult an ideological opponent without tripping on his own ignorance. Bless his little heart.
They should ask Osama Bin Laden if our President is an appeaser, oh wait, they can't, he's sitting at the bottom of the ocean.